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| Social Networking Addiction |
I became aware of the amount of time I spent on facebook well over a year ago. I was working from my home, from a computer and the convenience of facebook gave me an escape from my job editing. Somehow, I managed to do both, but it slowed me down considerably. I know I could have done a better job seeing the results I wanted, had I spent less time worrying about how many people requested me or I accepted on facebook. The numbers are deceiving - even in the realm of a social network, the quality of people are far more better than the quantity of people. I went from 5,000 "friends" to the current 976 - still more than I want. I have been blessed in meeting some really nice people online, while some only appeared nice while online, and even in a medium like facebook, there are those who will take advantage. There will be those who have ulterior motives - I want or need something from you to make my life better. These are the 'it's all about me' sector, that rely on others to get them to where they want to be. Notice, I said 'want to be?' I will spend time, when I find the time, to bring my friends list down to 500. Still a high number in my opinion.
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| This is me on my facebook account over a year ago - June 2010 |
I have had my Google+ account for two weeks - July 2011, and have nearly reached 500 connection in "my circles" - which is my limit there. On Twitter I am over 2000 - in truth that is way out of hand. All this information coming to you so quickly, it is like hit and miss. I occasionally will read something I feel is of importance and share with facebook, LinkedIn, my Blog and a few other sites, that all run off my Twitter feed. The thing I like most about Twitter is one must be creative when posting a status, for it only allows 140 characters, and this includes 'space' and punctuation'. There are never any long ramblings - I leave that for my Blog. I usually Tweet in the mornings before work or when I am in the office, to post events, a news story, something amusing, the weather forecast in my area - anything that interest me.
Selfishly, my accounts are now more about me, what is going on in my world, and I my random thoughts. If anyone takes an interest, I am happy. I wish happiness for everyone. But I know life did not begin on facebook, it will not end on facebook. The family and friends you know in 'real time' are the ones you need to spend time with the most. These people are the ones I have lunch with, dinner with, play golf with, go for a swim with, work with, attend social events with, have conversations with, plan road trips with, go shopping with, celebrate life's events with; the weddings, the baby showers, the graduations, the holidays, a funeral...etc.
It is easy to spot those trapped is the realm of facebook or another network, they post statuses from morning till to night and comment on other's post in great lengths. I see some who post back to back, and back round again. Checking your page through the day is fine, but limit that, too. If you need to respond or comment, do, but do not use that as an excuse to spend your entire day on any network. It makes me wonder if facebook and the like are all you have going for you. It makes me wonder if you are truly happy with where your life has taken you. When one limits their communication via text, it concerns me. Chances are some of the people you chat with daily are misrepresenting themselves to you. Some are not even the people they have in the photographs they use. For these they will never meet you face-to-face; they cannot. Forget about Skype or any cam-to-cam, they cannot show their face, because it is not the one they have as their profile photo. You may luck out with a phone call, but who wants that? Who are you actually speaking to? Of course, I am speaking of those who live, eat and breathe social networking.
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| Just Say |
Assess your addiction. Socializing online can be addicting - but if you are doing it to the exclusion of face-to-face time in your important relationships, it could be a problem. If you answer yes to any of these questions, you may need a social network intervention:
Do you lose time at work due to social networking abuse?
Does your spouse or significant other complain about the amount of time you spend on these sites?
Do you use social networking because you feel shy with people?
Do you feel out of control of your time when using these sites?
Does using these services decrease your overall ambition?
Do you have to check your facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, G+ or other sites a certain number of times daily?
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| Pick Your Poison |
Change your networking routines. If updating your status is the first thing you do in the morning, leading to all-day social networking binges, substitute another activity. Grab a frappe or latte at a nearby coffee shop, hit the gym in the morning, or do some volunteer work. Go for a walk, a run, do gardening, tend to your spouse, child(ren), pets, home or work. Instead of settling in with some wine to contribute to your friend's Lil Green Patch, pick up a movie to watch instead.
Spend less time alone. The idea behind social media is to feed our desire for being social - so don't subvert that need by only interacting via the computer. Log off, call some friends, and set up an adult play date that involves face-to-face interaction.
Change your home page and remove all social network sites from your bookmarks. If you're addicted to them, chances are these social media sites pops up the minute you open your browser. How could you not take a peek to see if your high school boyfriend accepted your friend request? Give yourself a break; change your home page.
Write a book, start a blog, or pen a song. Part of the appeal of social media is its ability to allow us instant personal expression. Instead of spending hours on a 25 Things survey, find another way to express yourself. Taking a writing class, signing up for guitar lessons, or perfecting your comedy routine will get your creative juices flowing - and give you an offline audience and real social interaction.
Spend less time alone. The idea behind social media is to feed our desire for being social - so don't subvert that need by only interacting via the computer. Log off, call some friends, and set up an adult play date that involves face-to-face interaction.
Change your home page and remove all social network sites from your bookmarks. If you're addicted to them, chances are these social media sites pops up the minute you open your browser. How could you not take a peek to see if your high school boyfriend accepted your friend request? Give yourself a break; change your home page.
Write a book, start a blog, or pen a song. Part of the appeal of social media is its ability to allow us instant personal expression. Instead of spending hours on a 25 Things survey, find another way to express yourself. Taking a writing class, signing up for guitar lessons, or perfecting your comedy routine will get your creative juices flowing - and give you an offline audience and real social interaction.
When your life is out of order, other things within your life are, too. Chances are, your marriage is on the rocks. If one invested the time into a relationship with their spouse, that they do being online, they would reap the benefits. You most likely have let yourself go. Has your hygiene, dental care, hair, appearance, weight, health, eating habits or self confidence suffered from spending, too, much time online? Social networking has most likely interfered with the sexual relationship between you and your spouse. If you do not work outside the home, your spouse may come home from their job to find you in the same clothes your had on when waking up that morning (if you woke up at all). Your relationships with your children are probably teetering, because I bet when your child(ren) approaches you and you are so into a post, you most likely do not take the time to hear your child or tend to their needs. Some may even tell their child(ren) "Not now! Can't you see I am busy?" If you are honest with yourself, you probably stopped making dinner for your family, and if you do, you most likely eat yours in front of the computer screen. You probably do not check your child's homework or attend their soccer game. These relationships with your loved ones cannot take a backseat to social networking. They must be nurturer and made to feel part of a family unit. Please, do not allow your child(ren) to feel second to a stranger(s) you have only met online? And what about your home - it probably could use an overhaul and cleaning from the neglect some of you have given it. The dusting, dishes, laundry, sweeping, vacuuming, moping, cleaning the bathroom fixtures, the counter tops, stove top and the kitchen sink all take time. They do not get done by themselves.
The word neglect means:
–verb (used with object)
1.
to pay no attention or too little attention to; disregard orslight: The public neglected his genius for many years.
3.
to omit, through indifference or carelessness: to neglect to reply to an invitation.
–noun
6.
an act or instance of neglecting; disregard; negligence: The neglect of the property was shameful.
Take back control of your life. The life your knew prior to social networking. Do not allow those you love to suffer, because of your addiction to social networking.
ℰℒℬ
2011
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